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sunday 27.01.08

yesterday went to vivo..
ate dinner at white dog's cafe.
yummyy..
sat by the window..
but the view is like sai..
cause all u can see is construction work..
but brings back lots of memories from the past...

then went to watch 27 dresses..
a story about a lady who always love weddings..
so she went to many weddings and be the bridesmaid..and taking care of everything for the wedding..
she went to 27 weddings altogether and kept all the 27 dresses when she wore as a bridesmaid..
she met this writer from the New York Journal..
this writer actually fell in love with her when he was doing an article on her..
and the actress slowly found her long awaiting true love..
28th wedding is her very own wedding..

light-hearted and intersting show =)

Reflecting 。。。。

wed 23.01.08

taking a breather..
west coast park
the sea
serene
tranquil
cold wind
so clam it slows down the turmoil in your heart

thanks..


thurs 24.01.08

cafe cartel at ps..
somehow the same seats..
same place..
but different ppl..
relaxing..
American gangster, nice show..
english version of protege.but.much better.
keeps u in suspense..

thanks..


fri 25.01.07

out in town.with rainbow.
from wheelock place to heeren to cineleisure..
The Mist.
full of big big bugs.
most of the time i just keep my head down on wong's shoulder.
depressing..
ended with four gunshots in the car.
and the main lead.
the one living suffers the most..
he killed all, including his son..the so cute boy..
then.. the twist is after killing them so tt they wun die in the mouth of the monsters,
the Mist cleared and the monsters dead..military ...armies came to rescue..
wth
and ya..gt one super-noisy and irritating woman..
when she was shot..ppl in the cinema just cheer and clap..
LOL.
she shd have just die earlier..

home.
on the way.
i just really broke down.
bottled feelings were somehow let out..
i cant keep them any longer..
i cant keep the tears of sadness and pain..
anymore..

thanks for being there..





sat 26.01.08

woke up and picked up my mp3 player at toh guan road.
then home.
then went out to aljunied to buy tv..
then to town to meet serene nj steve weiling and xinhui
wanted to watch 27 dresses..but no suitable timeslots
home
soo tired..


my dear friends..
cheer up..
though i know its difficult
esp now..

I'm really soo tired,,
been going thru so much kinds of emotions..
the fear
the pain
the heartbreaking
the loneliness
the isolation i gave to myself..

i guess i just need a break..
to start afresh
time will heal ..

再深的伤口也有痊愈的一天吧。

学着去释怀

The day you decided to let go..

I cant seems to find my soul...

在这寂寞的夜里
听着有所共鸣的歌
我试着掩饰的伤心一一被释放出来
这些歌就像面无情的镜子
照出了此刻的伤心与难过
那么复杂的心情我无法作解释
而伤心的原因我也无法说出来
只知道很伤心很难过

我的心像是被掏空
麻麻的，似痛又非痛
明明很伤心却哭不出来
压抑的情绪无法完全被释放出来
好闷好闷

站在人群中显得各外孤单
因为不想在人群中哭泣
不想让人看到见我伤心的眼泪
所以仰头望着天空
试着让欲流的眼泪倒流回心中
或是听着轻快的音乐来平复自己想哭的心情

我呆呆的走在街上
不知道要做什么
也不知道要看什么
眼睛不经意的停留在那些有你的回忆
一起看过的电影
一起走过的地方
一起吃过的食物
当初的快乐时光成了今天伤心的回忆

我知道时间是唯一解药
但却无法从中取得一丝安慰
守着电话却等不到他
心里的雨倾盆而下
泪晕开明信片上的牵挂
那伤心原来没有时差
画面开始没有他
我却还在装傻
假装自己已解开冰冷的手铐

我想画一个圈
把自己关在里面
把回忆挡在外面
却不能停止想念一幕幕甜蜜的画面
越是想向前就越是退后
越是在乎就越脆弱
越是开心就越失落
你的笑容你的温柔我不想忘记
因为那是我拥有过的幸福

虽然知道没有结果
虽然知道你的好意
虽然知道你不想让我在等待
虽然知道你不想浪费我的时间
虽然知道你的不想伤害
但还是忍不住伤心
知道你还是关心着
是我唯一的一点安慰

当对的人等不到对的时间
我们成了两个不同世界的人
就像是黑夜与白昼
我舍不得爱在放手那一刻
当初心动的原因成了今日心痛的理由

拼命想挽回的从前
已从我紧握的双手溜走
失去你的好
这幸福的碎片要我怎么捡
怎么去捡。。。。。

yesterday went to Joanne's bday party at Chervons in Jurong..
really happy to see my classmates..
and its a comfort to me..
catching up with them..still as lame as ever..
but that wat makes the feelings familiar..
stayed over . and i do nth but watch tv and stare into the space..

thanks for all the concern..

Thousand words to say

thousand thoughts to tell

but its all over..

*heartfelt pain*

what have i been doing??


thursday 10.01.2008

met wong ,ling and sam at central...
then they bought the leggings..i mean ling..
then had dinner at yoshinoya..


friday 11.01.2008

wanted to meet him today..
but he had to go back camp for training..
wanted to talk things out..but everytime all my unhappiness died out le then we gt the chance to meet..
by then i dun wan to talk about these anymore..
soo..haiz..

had dinner with gkg xh nanjun and serene..
at sakae lot one..
then i went home..while they went to watch aliens and predators.
kenna caught by one prudential financial advisor..
lol..he's trying to recruit me .. dots...
so sat down and listen to him..
haha..

thennn..
went home and went to chinatown to meet my good friend and friends..
went to ktv..
lol...last minute de..no plan..
nth to do at home so why nt...gt the urge to sing..
the friends singing super ...talented..
amazingly good...
both thumbs up!!!

monday 07.01.2008

Express yum cha during lunch will all my colleagues..
yum yum..


tuesday 08.01.2008

right here typing ...

No one understands me..nt even you..

i have decided to maybe so called withdraw a little from this very much treasured relationship..
maybe putting too much effort aint a good idea...
my life shouldnt evolved ard tt special someone..
which i subconciously does..
without knowing it..
losing myself into it..

mayb i should nt expect anything from him.
then there wont be disppointment..
mayb i will be more happy..
or at least wont b sad..

ya..
i dun understand u..
with the little time little conversations we had little communication we had..
i really dun understand..
i dun understand why u dun understand its hard for me to understand and trying to control my emotions when i gt no response from you.
u dun understand girls are more sensitive than u guys.
u dun understand how i feel when i see no reply from u
i dun expect immediate reply but at least a reply..
u dun understand how i was hurt by my ex ..
and tt ..i am once bitten twice shy..
and tt when similar things start to happen..
i worried..
maybe i think too much and ya i think too much but u dun understand tt is bcos of the environment i grow up in made me who i am, made me forced me to think much more..
u think i dunn wan to like other ppl who have a happy family or rather a complete family..
i wished i had one..but no..
things are not gonna be the same again..
on the surface i dun seems to care but nobody knows deep inside it does matters a lot..
nobody knows..

nobody..
nobody knows i wanted to study but i cant.
and they keep asking me about it..
its a torture..
to have to go thru these again and again.
i dun wan anyone to know in detail just dun pester me about my studies..

life is short ..
i wan to do the things i like
to enjoy my everyday..as much as possible
to overcome the fears and uncertainties in life.
i know what i am doing and i will do wat i supposed to do if i can.
so dun tell me to do sth i really cant do.

friday 04.01.2008

dinner with a good friend at citylink...
then....
home


sat 05.01.2008

went to repair my mp3 player..
with wong...
thanks for the acc..
then to bugis to meet the girls..
went shopping at far east..
we seriously combed the whole of far east..
finally the girls bought their stuff at the last 2 shops..
lucky..
a very nice sales girl who is 19 at the shop..mesh..her name is cherie?
ha. forget le..
then wx come meet us for dinner..
had dinner at mos-shaw tower..
had a bunch of china-act-slang gang behind.
actually is only one guy who acted gay la..
lol..
then to fy hse to have some WII fun..
ha...fun!

thursday 03.01.2008

met the girls to go shopping at bugis..
wx came to find us at bugis.then had icecream at HollandV..
mixed and match icecream at coldrock...
then..home..

went home to sleep and woke up.
called him and we had a conversation.. that i dunno is good or bad..

Hey happy new year everyone..!

lets threw away the bad of 2007 and welcome 2008 with much anticipation and hopes..

alright ..wat did i do with my rainbow clinque?

we met at raffles place..then to lau pa sat to have dinner.
then to the grass patch..at 7pm?
oh..
sound kaisu..
but in the end ..the view of fireworks were as good..
but the waiting process was tough and long..
for a moment i really felt like going home..
i'm super cold and sick..
and all the black shit ard us..
absolutely smelly and suffocating...
all the shit closing up on us..
at any moment if we retreat a little..our territory will be full of BLACK SHIT..
and did i mention the BLACK SHIT some how get its way through the fence and landed themselves on the coast...
if the black shit dropped into the river..
i would think Serves them right!
haha..
oh well..i'm mean..
but seriously..they are just so unsightly

oh ya..
thats some kind of filming going on there.
heard will be some movie..
oh well..
oh well..

after the fireworks..
we walked to tanjong pagar..
with friends..
journey never seems long..
we went to selegie to have beancurd..
nice!

and..finally when i went home.
i emptied my stomach...all beancurd gone to waste..
hahaha..